Posts tagged ‘31 days; things to improve’

02 – Things to Improve

right now?

My attitude.

I’m in a shitty effin mood (may explain in a new post) and I can’t seem to shake myself out of it. 

Sleep would help.

So would a break.  but the break ain’t coming so waiting for it would be futile.

I think I need to break something (someone?)…lemme go search for a demo project >:)

2 – Things to Improve

Oh boy, is this a good subject for me…

First and foremost?  Doing things ONTIME and WHEN THEY ARE DUE!  I’m usually an extremely [maniacally] punctual person…but obviously not with everything *sigh*

Anyway, what else?

I need to improve my body.  and I don’t mean, nose job, lyposuction, ect.  I mean, EXERCISE (*shudders*)  I’m considered "obese" by medical standards.  I’m freakin FAT by my own.  This is the biggest I’ve ever been in my entire life.  Even pregnant I wasn’t this big.  It’s sad and pathetic and I have no one to blame but me.  So, I need to get over myself and on with the self-improvement.

I need to improve my work ethic.  I’ve hated my job for years.  Scratch that, I’ve hated my SUPERVISOR for years.  Well, "hate" is a strong word.  Let’s just say *I* found him lacking in the supervisory arena as well as the human arena (I swear he’s a Cylon).  Anyway, I will be getting a new supervisor…soon.  And BEFORE I do, I need to find my work ethic and fake being enthused by my new job.  I’m losing more hands-on engineering in favor of less travel and more contracting bullshit.  Ah, the sacrifices we make for our families.  [funny note:  a friend wants me to come give a speech about my "career" for Career Week.  Bwahahahahaha, like I have a freakin’ career worth giving two shits about, let alone trying to encourage others to enter *sigh]  See!  This is what I mean.  I need to fix this!

I need to improve my home.  And I don’t just mean fixing light switches; installing quarter-round; or building an addition.  All that needs to be done too, but I need to get a better grasp on keeping the house clean and organized.  I do well for a while and then I get really tired and do nothing but park my ass on the couch until I have energy again (SHIT!  I knew I forgot something…I have meds for that…and I haven’t taken them, damnit!)

Ok, on the heels of THAT one, I need to improve my health (and my management of it).  I have medicine for my borderline anemia (which I really SHOULD take, especially during my "visits from Mother Nature").  I have a pain/discomfort in my right armpit, that I’ve had for over 3 years now and no one seems to know what it is.  I need to keep getting tests until an answer is found.  Ugh, I hate medical tests…

Wow, these all seem to be interconnected, because that one leads me to…

I need to improve my financial status.  No, I don’t mean I need to go from Upper Middle Class to Upper Class.  I’m quite comfy in my UMC niche.  I mean, I need to get a better handle on my finances.  I do well for months and then something stupid throws me from my horse.  Lately, it’s all medically related, but I do have my "frivolous spending sprees" too.  They need to go.  I don’t even LIKE shopping, so I have no idea why I do that.

I need to improve my relationship with Gimpy.  No, we don’t have a BAD relationship, but he’s a pre-teen right now, soon to be a teen.  I want to, at the very least, maintain the relationship we currently have.  I *am* a good mother, I just have some "bad mommy moments".  I yell.  I scream.  I use my "evil voice".  I threaten.  I curse.  I punish (i.e., take away privileges).  Not ALL of that is bad, but a majority of it is.  I also need to learn to lead by example.  If I want him to keep his stuff neat and organized, I need to do the same with my own.  If I want him to get off his butt and go outside (to exercise/have fun), I need to do the same.  I’m working on it, but I need to be better at it.

I need to improve my temper.  I have a very bad temper and a very short fuse.  If anyone knows my brother, D, they know about temper.  Sadly, what they may NOT know is that mine is worse than his.  Significantly.  I’ve done wonders, over the years, in learning to control my temper, but every now and then, I let the monster loose…and it isn’t pretty.

Conversely, I need to improve my "suck it up" factor.  I tend to "suck it up" a lot in order NOT to lose my temper.  However, in many cases, it makes me look like a wuss or doormat.  Both are far from true.  But I’m still looking for the happy medium between "Napalm that bitch!" and "aw c’mon, wipe your feet on me, it’s ok".  Believe it or not, this is the hardest thing on my list.  Which probably leads to quite a few of the other items on my list.

I think I’m going to stop here because I’m beginning to lose focus (yet ANOTHER item to improve) because I’m already thinking about my next OVERDUE entry…

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