READ THE BIG PIECES

Startled

People have been asking me how I’m feeling, since my mom’s passing.

It’s kind of hard to describe.

I mean, yes, there’s sadness.  Pervasive, take-your-breath-away, sadness.  Definitely anger.  There’s a disconnection and feeling adrift, but the best way I can describe it is:

Have you ever seen a swaddled baby?  They’re all nice and snug inside that little blanket.  Safe.  Comforted.  But unswaddle them too quickly, and you get the startle response.  Arms and legs flail.  They’re eyes get wide and they scream/cry.

THAT is how I feel.  No safety-net. 

I feel lost, adrift and disconnected.  No safe harbors.

And it blows.

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